I believe you
by ppa
Summary: She wanted to tell him. Just blurt out those three words. But when she finally did, Haruno Sakura realized that it was too late. And now she was left to wallow in ther own misery and loneliness. Oneshot. NaruxSaku


Whee! First story - done. And posted. Trust me, this is a major accomplishment. I didn't think I'd have time to post this or even write it. So I'll just slap on a disclaimer and some notes before I go celebrate by not going to the school talent show.

Disclaimer: I will never own Naruto unless I illegally buy the rights to it. Which I would never do.

* * *

There's so much dust. I wipe it off with my sleeve. I watch the wood for a few minutes, and the box stares back. We're both traveling down a well-worn path. It's still the same deep shade of red, I notice. It's been that color ever since Naruto and I picked it out at the dollar store. I remember hugging him because of it. 

"It's my favoritetest color!" I cried. He blushed. We were four. Mother and Father disliked him, but Naruto and I had something in common. Loneliness. People hated him for the Kyuubi. People hated me for my forehead. We were comrades. But that was a long, long time ago.

I fumble with the lock and throw the lid open.

A smile appears when I see the paper. There it is. Sakura Haruno. My name. Father laughed so hard when I asked him about it. He told me my mother was unconscious and he was sitting in a bar when I was born. He told me he was so drunk, he passed out immediately after naming me. The only reason why I received my name at all was because he blurted out "Sakura" when he saw the pink tufts of hair.

"That name's too delicate for you," he said. "Should've named you Tomiko. Maybe we'd be rich too." (1)

Naruto told me that Sakura was a beautiful name. I believed him, but I didn't tell him.

I drag myself out of my memories before I dig deeper into the box.

The next thing I pull out is a ribbon. It shines and shimmers and flutters just like it did when I met Ino.

Ino. She dragged me out of my loneliness. She led me to a new life. She gave me that ribbon and told me to never hide behind my bangs.

"There see? It makes you look a lot better." Ino tied my hair back with that ribbon. It was red, not particularly deep, but deep enough to wonder how she knew what my favorite color was. I suppose I should have thanked her. I did. But ever since that day I felt inferior. I was never good enough.

Naruto told me that I would always be number one to him. I believed him, but at the moment, I was too upset to tell him.

Below the ribbon, a crumpled ball of paper looks up and accuses me harshly. I smooth it out. It's a note from Naruto, declaring to the world in big, deep red characters "I LOVE YOU, SAKURA-CHAN." It was from my fangirl days. I dumped Naruto's friendship for a hopeless crush. It disgusts me how easily I left him for somebody half the man he was.

Naruto always told me he loved me. I believed him, deep down, but I loved Sasuke too much to tell him.

I plunge my arm in the box and it came back with a pendant. Naruto presented it to me on my 19th birthday. It's a red fox, the exact same color as the box.

"Sorry," he mumbled, looking to his side. "I wanted a cherry blossom, but they ran out." I kissed him on the cheek. He blushed. I believed him, but I never told him.

I peer inside the box. There's so much more I dumped inside. I spot a picture, taken at a plastic soda bottle, from the time Sasuke, Naruto, and I tried to send a message-in-a-bottle across the sea, only to realize that Konohagakure was completely landlocked. My eyes linger on a party celebrating the remaining Team 7's promotion to ANBU. I stare in a mix of somberness and heartbreak at the black box at the bottom. Naruto handed it to me before he left on his latest mission.

He asked me not to open it until he returned, but since his mission had gone awry, I see no point in waiting. I crack it open and feel tears well up in my eyes. Before I start a mental breakdown, however, I close it.

I'm done reminiscing. I pack everything neatly into the box. Briefly, I wonder if I should take it with me. Of course. It's partially his, after all. I head towards the hospital where Naruto is.

It's been a long while since I actually looked at my surroundings. Sakura trees sway in the wind. Almost all the petals have drifted off, but it's still beautiful. Some Academy students hide in corners playing "ninja." An old woman beats the dust and dirt out of an oriental rug.

I'm awestruck. Has Konoha always been this peaceful?

I have no time to think further, because I arrive at the hospital. I ask the receptionist where Naruto is, and she replies in a polite voice that he's in Room 247. Then she does a double take on me and recognition fills her face, but it's quickly replaced by a look of pity. I just smile at her and continue up the stairs, still holding my box.

When I reach the room, friends and family leave with their heads down and in low spirits. I stand off to the side and wait patiently while each person passes by. I'm amazed we all stuck together this long.

Kakashi comes by first, muttering something about Obito and repeated history.

Iruka's second. He's silent, and everyone keeps it that way. We all know his view of Naruto.

Jiraiya's the third. He walks a bit slower than usual and with a slump.

Konohamaru exits with a betrayed gleam in his eyes. Naruto must've promised him something.

Hinata walks out crying.

My mother exits with a smug smile. The fact she even _came_ surprises me.

Neji has an empty look on his face.

Tenten and Lee follow him, the same expression on their faces.

Shikamaru looks devastated about the loss of one of his closest friends.

Chouji follows closely. He's not eating anything.

Anko-san comes out so broken. I've never seen her like this before.

Kiba seems disappointed.

Ino leaves with crushed flowers. I guess she didn't know when she came.

Shino leaves in his usual silence, only today, it seems a little hollow.

Yamato passes by solemnly. He doesn't wave or smile at me. He shouldn't feel responsible. There was no way to know that Akatsuki would come.

Sai glances at me when he exits. There's a depressed look in his eyes, and I know he's thinking of his nameless brother.

Gai's next. I look with shock. He's dressed in black and without any hint of cheerfulness or the youth he's always gushing about with Lee.

Asuma and Kurenai leave together, with Kurenai crying on Asuma and Asuma comforting Kurenai.

To my surprise, Gaara, Kankuro, and Temari emerge. Gaara doesn't say anything, but everyone stays a safe distance away anyways because of the violent aura.

Tsunade comes out with a haunted expression and tells me she's sorry.

"We did everything we could, but he -" her own voice cuts her off. I know what Naruto meant to her. So I reassure her that everything will be alright. I set the box down and usher her out of the hospital before I head back to Room 247.

Everybody left. I slip inside after picking up the box again.

Naruto looks so peaceful. His eyes are closed and there's a small smile on his face. I wonder what he was thinking of when he died. There is no indication of the pain and suffering he just endured when his soul was ripped out.

My smile breaks and I start sobbing my heart out.

I'm here today, next to Naruto's body, but I feel so lonely. All those years ago when we just became genin. When Sasuke told me I didn't know what loneliness was. I still remember those times. I suppose that I really forgot. But I remember what loneliness is now. I wish I didn't.

I look at my friend and blame him. Even though I shouldn't, I can't help it. I don't want to be left alone and miserable. But it doesn't last long. Naruto deserves better than scapegoat comments.

Life is not fair. Nothing is ever fair. Sasuke ran off to Orochimaru years ago, and now, Naruto's gone too. Forever.

Stupid Akatsuki. They have to ruin everything.

I slide the box onto the bed stand next to Naruto. All of our memories together, gathered there. I want to leave, be anywhere, any-when else than here. But I can't, not yet. I lean in towards the blond and tell him something I should have said long ago.

"I believe you Naruto. Thank you for the engagement ring."

* * *

(1) Tomiko means child of wealth 

I really have no notes or comments on this other than I hope everyone catches the hints on how Naruto died. And that people won't kill me for killing him. Review if you want, I'm not really expecting anything.


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